Dark Knights: The Dark Humor of Police Officers

Dark Knights: The Dark Humor of Police Officers

There is nothing quite like the police officer sense of humor.

Police Officers are the modern-day embodiment of medieval knights, going to work each day with a noble cause to protect and serve society. The profession requires cops to see people at their worst. They see death, tragedy, crime, and despair on a daily basis. The very nature of the tasks cops perform, and the things cops see skews their sense of humor. Sometimes, a sense of humor is the only defense mechanism in a police officer’s toolbox. Stripped of the ability to laugh, or forced to be politically correct in a politically incorrect work environment can be hazardous to one’s health. Coping becomes an essential component of a police officer’s arsenal. One of the primary coping mechanisms utilized by cops is humor. A cop can find something funny about almost anything, regardless of how tragic the circumstances. Dark humor involves making light of a serious, disturbing or taboo subject matter. It is sometimes viewed as morbid, cruel, offensive, and graphic in nature and is yet, still found funny. This is the story of the author’s twenty-year police career with the New York City Transit Police and NYPD as he worked with some of New York City’s darkest knights – those cops who did and said the funniest things under the most difficult circumstances. $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Running With Wolves: A Woman’s Memoir of Sex, Scandal and Seduction

Free: Running With Wolves: A Woman’s Memoir of Sex, Scandal and Seduction
Playboy, celebs, the Hollywood Casting Couch to Silicon Valley and online adult sites, the hilarious scandalous real truth behind the scenes of the adult business. Free on Kindle.
amazon buy now

A Narrator’s Tale: The Dubious Efforts of Poor Men

A Narrator’s Tale: The Dubious Efforts of Poor Men
Since creation, humankind has promptly freaked out over three big truths: the existence of the omnipresent Writer, the World apparently being a massive hibernating lifeform, and the roving voice in the sky, known as the Narrator, solely existing to entertain the other gods at humanity’s expense. Long after the acceptance of these big truths, the Narrator’s newest adventurer has incidentally altered fate.

It all begins with Horluf, a homeless man in a big city who has a chance at turning his life around. When the unexpected happens, the Narrator’s all-knowing knowledge falters, and more adventurers figuratively tie themselves into the tale at hand. There’s Dun, who owes a hefty sum to a mobster; Sinclair, the loyal mute with brave intentions; John Carl, a theatrically-merry debt collector; and an impossible “metal man,” who actually isn’t so much more absurd than the otherworldly servant with a slight memory problem.

Their quest: to reluctantly seek out a purportedly haunted treasure with a rather peculiar past. All the while, the Narrator must make do with a story that continuously strays further and further away from what was ever intended. $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Cupcakes and Corpses

Free: Cupcakes and Corpses
A serial killer is terrorizing Cleveland, PI Claire’s hometown. When her beloved former babysitter is murdered, it gets personal for Claire. Pursuing the suspects through sleazy bars, churches, bingo parlors, and music studios, Claire puts herself in the killer’s sights. As the corpses pile higher than meringue on a pie, Claire is determined to hunt down the murderer before he kills again. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Saint Bob Day

Free: Saint Bob Day
5 years into the Federal Witness Security Program, former trucking executive, Bob Deighton, lives a quiet life as Bob Day, senior maintenance man at the Belle Rive Lodge and Club, Florida’s 4 diamond oceanfront resort hotel, until the day he saves 3 lives, becomes a local hero and his low profile fades. Bob’s past is about to catch up with him. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: The Pizza Prophet

Free: The Pizza Prophet
Following a near-death experience, an aging pizza delivery expert presumes he’s a prophet and a local prostitute his unsuspecting oracle. The Pizza Prophet is hilarity with all the toppings: mobsters, romance and plenty of tips (from above). Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free Seas: Orion

Free Seas: Orion
Avast, mateys!

Follow the adventures of the esteemed Water Elemental known as Captain Lefty, commander of the mighty pirate ship, the Fallen Angel, as he and his quirky yet charming crew fight to save the world from the menace of Orion, an irate giant from beyond the stars, hell-bent on getting violent revenge for the tragedies of his past. Enter this magical world today and set sail! $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

A Haunted Past

A Haunted Past

Angie Conaty, has long suffered from a reoccurring nightmare. The same one she’s had since childhood. As an adult the dreams come far less frequently, due to her demanding public relations position, in the Toronto based reality television station, Gottchaon TV. The channel is in hot water currently, with the creators son – an entitled rich manchild – at the helm. Knowing that his mother, Judy Jones the creator of the investigative reality channel, hand picked Angie to mentor, Jason elects Angie to be the assistant director for his new show, Sustainable. Angie has no choice but to fly out to the remote fishing town in British Columbia, the very next morning.

When she arrives, things quickly take a turn for the worst! Her dreams become hallucinations, and they come vividly, while she is fully lucid, and working with the handsome and rugged Max Murphy, Sustainable’s leading man! Soon Angie accidently enlist the help of local mediums, and husbands Yin and Larry, two charmingly different characters, who immediately take Angie under their wing. Can Angie solve the mystery of her Haunted Past? $2.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

One Fine Mess

One Fine Mess
One Fine Mess is an action-packed crime comedy, set in Vermont, with a strong female protagonist. There is no maple syrup, but there are mobsters, cops, drug dealers, and a head in a box. Think fun. Think suspense. Think wild, sexy ride. It’s time to show some ovaries. $0.99 on Kindle

amazon buy now
Buy on iTunes

Lord of the Zombies: Box Set

Lord of the Zombies: Box Set

Lord of the Zombies is a hilariously gruesome spin on the zombie apocalypse story. If you like Shaun of the Dead, classic sci-fi flicks, and deranged zombie killing goats, then this saga is right up your alley.

In Apocalypse, Simon is 40, single, and hasn’t done anything memorable with his life. When a freak energy wave from space wreaks havoc upon the earth, he turns from ordinary to extraordinary in a hurry.

On the run with a handful of survivors, Simon has one huge problem: his best friend Nick has become a zombie and is assembling an undead army to hunt him down.

In Awakening, The shortest apocalypse in history is over. After saving all of humanity, Simon wakes to find he’s a human-zombie hybrid. As if that weren’t enough, he’s discovered a new plot to take over the world.

With his friends taken hostage and a mad general fixing to get a piece of his DNA, Simon must learn to fight once more. Will using his newfound zombie superpowers be enough to save humanity the second time around?

In Armageddon, a race of intergalactic lizards arrives in orbit and lays siege to the planet.

With Earth’s armies in retreat, it will fall to Simon once more to fight the invaders and risk making the situation worse… if that’s even possible. $2.99 on Kindle.
amazon buy now

Free: Detective Schizoaffective

Free: Detective Schizoaffective
At 35 years old, Jameson is battling a major depressive episode after experiencing a bout of mania he never saw coming. Worst of all, he’s forgotten what to hope for. Driven by a few chance encounters and an investment opportunity of a lifetime, Jameson takes a leap of faith and finds himself soaring toward a new beginning. The sudden control he has over everything is intoxicating, but it comes with a harsh consequence. Faced with the threat of throwing away his whole life, and his family, Jameson has no choice but to go all-in. Free on Kindle

amazon buy now

Free: Jacobites by Name

Free: Jacobites by Name
The Tory government in London have appointed a Viceroy to run Scotland to stop a second independence referendum being held. The result is a Jacobite Rebellion. Chaos ensues. Meanwhile, someone is trying to clone Nessie. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Sally Stanford, California’s Grand Bordello House Madam

Sally Stanford, California’s Grand Bordello House Madam

Sally Stanford didn’t set out to be a madam, but she openly tells how it happened. Sally tells about the scandalous and riotous happenings along the way to her becoming perhaps California’s most famous bordello house madam.

She openly declares that Humphrey Bogart was banned from her establishment because of his treatment of her girls. She characterized Actor Errol Flynn was one of her favorite customers. $1.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

The REAL Program Manager’s Handbook

The REAL Program Manager’s Handbook

Do you work a 9 to 5? It doesn’t matter if you manage projects, crunch numbers, or bag groceries 5 days a week. Chances are you run into more than one of these annoying situations: a co-worker who calls to ask you the SAME question you’ve answered at least 3 times already. A seemingly never-ending meeting that cuts into your valuable online shopping or gaming time.

The solutions to these and other insanely irritating situations are found right here in this brief, easy-to-follow handbook. And when I say brief, I mean brief. I know how precious your time is. After all, it’s not quitting time just yet. You’ve got status updates, tweeting, and a ton of weekend planning to do! $2.99 on Kindle
amazon buy now

The Famous Union

The Famous Union

Famous Union College is a slow-moving train wreck, a place where what is what is not.

Two hapless heroes.

An exhibitionist secretary.

Bumbling administrators.

A paranoid football coach.

Conniving coeds.

A sex-obsessed football player.

Who knows what will happen next…$0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Aunt Lucie’s legacy

Aunt Lucie’s legacy

Aunt Lucie is a real pain in the neck. Her testament is crystal clear: to collect the inheritance, her nephews and their families have to move into her house, which is definitely not a palace! Aunt Lucie has another surprise up her sleeve, a sort of mad treasure hunt, ankle-deep in mud. Comical situations, flavorsome dialog and dramatic turns of events come fast and furious. $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

How to Win Girlfriends and Dominate People (Self-Help Parody)

How to Win Girlfriends and Dominate People (Self-Help Parody)
In this brilliantly funny book, Ronnie Champ shares stories from his own life to show you:

– How to use the Seven Habits of Highly Dominant People in the bathroom, so that you will always have your sh*t together
–  How to leverage the Law of Attraction to turn the entire Universe into your personal genie and sex slave, so that you can get all the lucky breaks and all the freaky hoes
– How to walk into any brothel in the world and get a girlfriend with only $117 in counterfeit money
– And much, much more! $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Time Is Irreverent 2: Jesus Christ, Not Again!

Time Is Irreverent 2: Jesus Christ, Not Again!
Marty Mann and Nellie Dixon are back for another irreverent, liberal, twisty, time-travel comedy! This time they have Jesus Christ, the actual guy, on their side. What would happen if a gun-hating brown-skinned Jesus time traveled to 2020 America? $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Snore Songs

Free: Snore Songs
Enjoy the value of a sense of humor in this whimsical rhyming story. Cute animals illustrations. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Nobody Loves Mustard

Free: Nobody Loves Mustard

Poor Mustard just wants to find someone — anyone — who loves him, but nobody loves Mustard. Kids of all ages will love this charming story written and illustrated by author Jeremy Ross. Both funny and touching, this tale reminds us of the remarkable feeling of being loved and the struggle we sometimes endure to find it. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Awaken the Giant Asshole Within!

Free: Awaken the Giant Asshole Within!
Are you ready to awaken the giant asshole within? Are you ready to achieve true greatness in Life? Then you will benefit from the wisdom of Ronnie Champ, professional Dominator.

This book is a collection of three funny parodies, excerpted from Mr. Champ’s hilarious self-help parody, How to Win Girlfriends and Dominate People; his politically incorrect satire, Mismanagement Is an Art; and his humor blog, www.RonnieChamp.com.

Ronnie Champ’s inner giant is woke, and he’s stomping around like Godzilla, tearing shit up, and crushing people like bugs under his feet! If you want to wake up the giant within you, then this book can show you how! Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

How to Win Girlfriends and Dominate People (Self-Help Parody)

How to Win Girlfriends and Dominate People (Self-Help Parody)
In this brilliantly funny book, Ronnie Champ shares stories from his own life to show you:

  • How to use the Seven Habits of Highly Dominant People in the bathroom, so that you will always have your sh*t together
  • How to leverage the Law of Attraction to turn the entire Universe into your personal genie and sex slave, so that you can get all the lucky breaks and all the freaky hoes
  • How to walk into any brothel in the world and get a girlfriend with only $117 in counterfeit money
  • And much, much more! $2.99  on Kindle.

amazon buy now

The Chauvinist’s Guide to Modern Romance: A Real Life Comedy About Men & Women

The Chauvinist’s Guide to Modern Romance: A Real Life Comedy About Men & Women
The Chauvinist’s Guide is a humorous look at sexual politics from a gender strategy point-of-view. The Guide offers many, many interesting insights into the subject, saying nothing of offering the best cache of images ever found in such a work.
For the young man who possibly has never read a book, this is the book for him! He may read it cover-to-cover on the day he opens it!

The Guide is enjoyed by both genders and all ages. No nudity or crudity here. $2.99 on Kindle

amazon buy now

The Bucket Shop

The Bucket Shop
Fresh out of college and desperate for work, Ben Thompson takes a job as an account rep in a wild and nutty call center. $2.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

The Chauvinist’s Guide to Modern Romance

The Chauvinist’s Guide to Modern Romance

The Chauvinist’s Guide is a humorous look at sexual politics from a gender strategy point-of-view. The Guide offers many, many interesting insights into the subject, saying nothing of offering the best cache of images ever found in such a work.

For the young man who possibly has never read a book, this is the book for him! He may read it cover-to-cover on the day he opens it!

The Guide is enjoyed by both genders and all ages. No nudity or crudity here.

So, learn the ways of the chauvinist stud. $2.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now