How to Leash a Thief

How to Leash a Thief

Life in Pleasant Hills, Texas, flows like sweet molasses. Normally. But nothing is pleasant or normal about murder.

On a hot summer night, southern and sassy Steely Lamarr discovers someone murdered the janitor at her newly acquired dog-grooming shop. Unfortunately, the rest of the community considers the deceased riffraff and a stain on society. But for Steely, the mysterious death of the coworker hits the heart. Steely vows to track down the killer with the help of her motley crew, a cheeky Chihuahua and her best friend Daniel. Except her dogged determination puts her in the doghouse. Especially with the gorgeous, new police officer in town.

When a bank heist turns Pleasant Hills upside down, Steely suspects the two crimes are related, and she sets out to prove it. As Steely chases clues across town, she winds up a suspect, on the murderer’s radar, and her boyfriend kicks her to the curb. She soon realizes, sometimes, the culprit is the one you’d never suspect who’s as crooked as a dog’s hind leg.

Can Steely catch the larcenous killer before she becomes the next victim? $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Dargo, Eco Hero! A Feel-Good Novella

HILARIOUS, HEART-WARMING, DIFFERENT and DELIGHTFUL!
A lonely young man suffers a massive defeat. When all is lost, he meets a fiery fortune-teller who pleads with him to save her.
Can he re-invent himself as a hero?
An enjoyable timely tale that will appeal to the magic in all of us.
Illustrations. $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Life Begins When The Kids Leave Home And The Dog Dies

Life Begins When The Kids Leave Home And The Dog Dies
ONCE UPON A TIME…

Chapter 1. A California girl named Barb met her prince of a guy. He was tall, dark, and handsome. (Actually, he was a Republican. But he was definitely tall.) They fell in love, and got married.

Chapter 2. He brought her to his castle in England and they lived happily ever after. THE END.

Luckily, 35+ years of living happened between Chapters 1 and 2, giving Barb plenty of material for this collection (in no particular chronological order) from her newspaper columns, articles, blog posts, and that time she killed Mom.

And that’s before Chapter 3 even starts.

“I have learned to put down the coffee and place breakable objects at a safe distance when a post from Barb Taub comes up. It is very hard to drink coffee and laugh at the same time without redecorating the desk…”—author Sue Vincent. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

A Virus Called Dog

A Virus Called Dog
A city where feelings are forbidden.
A deluded dictator with a bulbous bald head.
An experiment gone horribly wrong.
Will anyone survive the Virus Called Dog? $0.99 on Kindle

amazon buy now

If You See Kay Lie: A Badge Bunny Booze Humorous Mystery

If You See Kay Lie: A Badge Bunny Booze Humorous Mystery
BJ’s life is a three-ring circus. She’s juggling her jobs, her friends, and man-troubles, and then things get complicated.

Out on a morning walk with her dog, Twinkles, BJ stumbles over a dead body. Not quite what she expected before her first cup of coffee – or ever.

Come for a cop, stay for the friendship! $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Nothing Man

Nothing Man
One man in need of an overhaul and two women determined to drag him there. But is he courageous enough to seize these new opportunities in this humorous quest for a fresh start? $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

An Accidental Royal Kidnap

An Accidental Royal Kidnap
Need a good laugh? If so, grab this hilarious, and often surreal, regal romp that’s packed with majestic mystery, aristocratic intrigue & Great British humour. Join London schoolteacher George Nearly as he tries to work out why there’s a woman on his rug claiming to be a princess, what happened last night and why she thinks she’s been kidnapped! $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

The Gopher King

The Gopher King

Caddyshack meets Apocalypse Now, as a suicidal army veteran with PTSD finds salvation with the help of a magical creature who commands a weaponized army of 20,000 subterranean freedom fighters. $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Corporate Psycho

Corporate Psycho
If it weren’t so funny, it would be serious, very serious. The corporate world is gripped by a virus of bad behaviour. The corporate psychopaths have taken over.

Disgusting, selfish and downright mean behaviour is dressed and camouflaged as acceptable. We have gone to the dark side. The pressure of delivering year-in-year-out on the undeliverable has made it easier to disguise, but only for a short while, as karma reigns in those guilty. What has happened to the good guys, the standard-bearers of normality, decency and honesty? They are out there, plugging away, day in day out, fighting the good fight in the right way of course.

Let us not despair, let us look for our champions like Max Clarke as he goes head to head, chapter by chapter, in this mockumentary, a true confession of all sorts, as he takes on the psychopaths of big corporations and expose their rearguard and senselessness. The game is corporate snakes and ladders in a journey of witty confrontations, settling each score one by one at corporation Klink.

Corporate Psycho is a satirical expose of a business enterprise and organisation of people coming together in their pursuit of dominance, fame, success and greed. It comes at the expense of decent colleagues, ethical values and the fabric of the organisation and what it originally stood for.

Get your copy of this two-hour read and laugh away, as you will never see your workplace in the same way again! Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Name the Game

Name the Game

Newer fun game for friends (and foes). Poems of summer sporting events, individual and team sports. Poem titles are hints, or clues to the actual name of the game. Reading further into each poem, reveals a clearer meaning to solve the poem. Play alone or challenge your partner or teammates. Can you get a perfect 130 points? Can you find your own sport? Score well, and have some fun, with this lighter side of works, from the author. $3.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Mitzy Moon Mysteries Books 1-3: Paranormal Cozy Mystery (Box Set 1)

Mitzy Moon Mysteries Books 1-3: Paranormal Cozy Mystery (Box Set 1)

Find out why readers are addicted to this series…

The Mitzy Moon Mysteries: Box Set includes the first three books in the hilarious paranormal cozy mystery series. If you like snarky heroines, supernatural misfits, and a dash of romance, then you’ll love Trixie Silvertale’s twisty whodunits. Buy this Box Set to serve up the guilty today! $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

The Madonna of Fircombe on Sea

The Madonna of Fircombe on Sea

Disgraced consultant Alex has lost his job and been banished to Fircombe, a no-hope holiday resort. Can he save the town, and his soul? All whilst staying one step ahead of: a mad monk, a cuckolded South American revolutionary, and the Colonel’s wayward daughter. It’ll take a miracle. $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Shortbread: Glasgow Tales

Shortbread: Glasgow Tales
A boy with his head full of imagination thinks he’s a superhero, which gets him into a lot of trouble.
A man who visits places of interest and is unwillingly transported back in time to witness firsthand a moment in history.
Ten short stories $1.35 on Kindle
amazon buy now

450 One Line Insults and Put Downs: Funny Put Downs and Horrible Insults That’ll Win Any Argument

450 One Line Insults and Put Downs: Funny Put Downs and Horrible Insults That'll Win Any Argument
If you want to verbally destroy your friends and family with hilarious comebacks, without sounding like a child, then read on…

Looking to zing your friends, family, and co-workers with laughable one-liners?

Want a quick and simple insult that is perfect for every situation?

In need of a hilarious gag gift that’ll leave your recipient laughing out loud?

If so, 450 One Line Insults and Put Downs is for you, because it was written by professional comedians that specialize in raunchy retorts, crafted comebacks, and ouch-worthy insults.

Imagine having hundreds of hilarious responses at your disposal next time someone, friend or foe, tries to pick you fight with you!

Why This Book Is Different:

This book is different because it is jam-packed with content that is ACTUALLY funny for adults.

You’ll Soon Discover:

Hundreds of jaw-dropping and hilarious insults that will leave your opponent speechless.

The perfect one-line comeback for the friend that just loves giving you the finger.

Why this book is the perfect gag gift for someone that could use a helping hand in an argument.

What your personality, a busted chapstick, and beached whale all have in common.

A few golden classics involving your mother and all the terrible things about her.

And so much more! $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

We Must Save Jepson! (A Novella)

We Must Save Jepson! (A Novella)
Part rip-roaring adventure, part scathing historical satire, and entirely hilarious, We Must Save Jepson! is the tale of clueless-yet-determined librarian H. R. Huxtable and his band of misfits as they battle to rescue a beleaguered British outpost in Victorian-era central Africa. $0.99 on Kindle.
amazon buy now

Mutt to Megastar Series Boxset

A rescue dog tells his witty story about his new oddball life as a Celebrity Time Share dog. Humorous, insightful and unexpectedly candid, this dog’s purpose is to entertain you. From bestselling author Kit James, recognised for his humorous canine dialogue, comes a fun compilation of the first three books in the Mutt to Megastar Series. If you love W. Bruce Cameron and Spencer Quinn’s dog characters, then Elliott C. Cool is the dog for you. “A dog’s version of life, death and stardom”, Amazon Review. “Cheers and 5 stars … humorous canine dialogue. I loved it!!!”
$0.99 on Kindle.
amazon buy now

2020, An Obese Turtle: 101 COVID Words and Phrases We Want to Forget

2020, An Obese Turtle: 101 COVID Words and Phrases We Want to Forget
A funny, satirical and touching book about the myriad of new words and phrases 2020 and COVID-19 have given us. From Zumping (getting dumped on Zoom), to Covidiots to “when can I hug again” this humorous list covers 101 of the most poignant words and phrases. Some we just want to forget, some will live with us forever. A percent of profits will be donated to essential workers. $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Jack Hansen – Small Man of the Big City

Jack Hansen - Small Man of the Big City
Do you feel like a squirrel trapped inside a spinning wheel? Then you simply havent met Jack Hansen yet! Jack is an alright guy, but hes always betrayed by his bad luck. His neighbor, Garry, is always hooking up with yet another stunner. His co-worker, Bill, is constantly pursuing a brunette who ignores him. The toady Larson is always fawning and groveling to ingratiate himself to and become his bosss favorite. Austin next door does not believe in the sincerity of his lover Phils feelings for him. And, just perhaps, it is the mysterious young woman from the window across the street from his who is entirely to blame for the fact that Jacks day has taken an unexpected turn for the worse, and proceeds to go to the dogs? Free on Kindle.
amazon buy now
Buy on iTunes

Free: The Gopher King

The Gopher King
A suicidal former platoon sergeant, sole survivor of a Vietnam War jungle ambush, is haunted by what he perceives as his cowardly past. Debilitated by guilt and mourning the death of his wife, small-town newspaper publisher Stan Przewalski lives in a PTSD-fueled world where it is impossible to distinguish reality from fantasy. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

The Joint of No Return

The Joint of No Return

Bumbling stoner Charlie Hong has spent the last year in hiding, cultivating one last hare-brained scheme to escape his troubles: a clandestine marijuana operation. Just as he’s about to cash in, his cash crop is stolen by a bright light appearing in the night sky. After catching a ride with one of his plants, he finds himself thrown into a world far stranger than anything he could have possibly imagined.

Does the stoned stowaway have what it takes to free the Starseed—a massive living spaceship overflowing with bizarre life forms—from the clutches of a mysterious force field trapping it in Earth’s orbit?

Is he up for the challenge of fighting an evil Reptilian race bent on enslaving humanity?

More importantly, before he decides anything, does he have time to light one up? $0.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

My Neighbours Are Stealing My Mail

My Neighbours Are Stealing My Mail
More hilarious ghostly capers with Alan Rose and the Ghost of a 1970s stand – up comedian Frankie Fortune.

In their fourth book Alan Rose has quit his job and, much to his disappointment moved in with his girlfriend, Rosie. But if only it was. Rosy, that is. You see, he’s not getting any mail. Convinced his neighbors are stealing it, he investigates. Only to find evidence of…witchcraft.

Meanwhile the Merton Palace Theatre is being renovated. As the building work continues, strange noises can be heard from the cellar. What have the builders disturbed?

The crew of the cable TV show Scared Stiff are sent in to broadcast the strange happenings live on air.

What could possibly go wrong? $1.30 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Bad Elf

Bad Elf

A Goth-elf, Jack is not like most other elves at The Pole. He hates the cold. Hates making toys. And he thinks Santa might be just a little bit too stingy with the coal.

Afraid he might belong to a darker side of Christmas, Jack dreams of running away while Santa is out delivering presents. He steals the Naughty List, planning to use it as a map to find his Christmas demon idol, Krampus, who travels the world Christmas Eve to punish all the Naughty Children.

But Jack’s dream turns nightmarish just as he finally meets his idol and discovers that he is on Krampus’ Naughty List. And Krampus doesn’t play nice. At all. As a matter of fact, Krampus is downright evil…attacking Santa and dragging Jack’s kinda-sorta girlfriend, Candi, into the underworld. Can Jack rescue them and the Naughty Children in time to save Christmas? $2.69 on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Free: Holy Roundness

Holy Roundness
When a cult flourishes around a mysterious, floating sphere, believers may be in for a big surprise. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now

Kids Say The Darndest Things To Santa Claus

Kids Say The Darndest Things To Santa Claus

Where Art Linkletter left off, Santa Don picks up! After asking kids for their wish lists at Christmas as a volunteer Santa Claus, the author has heard it all. Now he shares the best of the best 85 stories. You’ll laugh, cry and recall the true meaning of Christmas for children. Sometimes funny, sometimes sad, but always touching and sweet, these stories will entertain and warm the hearts of readers. Santa Tells All! $2.99 on Kindle.

amazon buy now
Buy on iTunes

Free: Fake History: The Wildly Inaccurate, Ruthlessly Manipulative, Dangerously Deceptive, and REAL History of the World

Fake History: The Wildly Inaccurate, Ruthlessly Manipulative, Dangerously Deceptive, and REAL History of the World
Fake History is the textbook you wish you could have read while falling asleep in history class.

From Jesus Christ to Donald Trump, from Genesis to World War III, from ancient legends to alternative facts, Fake History takes a comic romp through the tangled narratives of history to reveal the scandalous truth of the world’s past and the incredible destiny to which it is heading. The provocative novel of “fictional nonfiction” takes the form of a mock textbook and rewrites human history as fake news. It satirizes the extremist spirit of the Information Age in all its social misinformation, political disinformation, and hysterical hyperreality. Free on Kindle.

amazon buy now